Comments on The Freedman Archives: The Schizoid: A Persecuted Minority

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2008-11-28T15:09:00.000-05:00

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This writeup is absolutely brilliant, articulate, ...

2008-06-21T01:30:00.000-05:00

This writeup is absolutely brilliant, articulate, and correct. I have been scouring the libraries and online journals for adequate information on SPD, and you seem to have it right here, good sir.

"Thus the schizoid's picture of 'good' behavior is distorted. The child learns never to nag or even yearn for love, because it makes the parent more distant and censorious. The child then may cover over the incredible loneliness, emptiness and ineptness he feels with a fantasy (often unconscious) that he is self-sufficient. Love and anger get hopelessly intertwined. Fairbairn argued that the tragedy of the schizoid child is that his conscience has been warped: he believes his love, not his hatred is the destructive force within. Love consumes. Hence the schizoid child's chief mental operation is to repress his or her normal wish to be loved."

So very true. I am a teenaged schizoid, and I found in my research on this condition that a lot of professionals have us tagged as "empty", "hollow", and "bitter". I would argue that we are not hollow; in fact, I think that if we were hollow we perhaps wouldn't suffer as much as we do. It is because we are not hollow that we suffer. We hate this need, this driving, fervent desire to love and be loved; we try to repress it and ignore it, and it is this love that causes pain. It is ironic therefore, that we even try to repress our pain until there is nothing left.

You are the first SPD source that has managed to pinpoint this crucial distinction: SPD emptiness does not derive from a lack of stimulation, but rather, too much of it causing subsequent withdrawal due to negative condition and traumatic experiences.

I got a lot of crap from my parents, teachers, professors, and other students about my seeming detachment and inability to commit.

Actually, I have recently met a friend who is, in all sense of the word, the most empathetic and compassionate individual I have ever met. We meet at both an intellectual level and a spiritual one, yet while I find myself wanting to spend time with this friend, it pains me to do so. It pains me to see this friend, and yet it pains me when I am not in her presence.

You have a fantastic writeup here, sir, and I commend you on your excellent research.

Wow, a good portion of your little blog here has c...

2008-05-09T23:26:00.000-05:00

Wow, a good portion of your little blog here has come straight (word-for-word) from the essay at:

http://www.pipeline.com/~dada3zen/schizoid_a_personality_not_a_disorder.htm

And here I thought I was just having an extreme case of deja vou.

Anyways, it certainly sounds like you could have a few other diagnoses other than SPD.

I can't begin to explain how much reading this has...

2008-04-10T20:54:00.000-05:00

I can't begin to explain how much reading this has helped me. I've been so depressed for the past half year... I'm in love with a Schizoid and have been taking everything so personally, even though he's finally gotten it across to me that it's not me... it's everyone... I know him well enough to know that he is one and it hurts me so badly knowing that it'd be best if I just left him alone (or so I feel it would be). I have gone about our "relationship" all wrong. I guess you can call us acquaintances because he has bluntly told me "he's not looking for friends, " and I believe it. Thank you so much for this post. If you can offer any advice, I would appreciate it.

I think I may suffer SPD. They way you described y...

2008-04-09T02:45:00.000-05:00

I think I may suffer SPD. They way you described yourself and your feelings was 'bang on' with my own, which depresses me. I am married, but i fear that my coldness may eventualy drive her away. Have you suffered similar problems with your relationships?
Lastly, I have only recently have the moments of self realization you describe, and it terrifies me. I can't sleep at night, as I fear there is no hope of change. Have you been able to remedy your situation in any way?

Regards

I am a person who is diagnosed with SPD and to tel...

2008-03-20T13:45:00.000-05:00

I am a person who is diagnosed with SPD and to tell you the truth i found your long winded blogg offensive.

You make us seem like we are mentally disabled and have no control over our actions. When in reality schizoids have more control over their actions than the average person.

Stop being the victim and start finding a soltuon. Ok your shrink may be stuffed THEN CHANGE HER.

From what you have said there I honestly think you suffer from some form of depression, look to a cure to that before you start blaming it on being a schizoid.

thank you. your site was informative and personal....

2006-06-20T15:15:00.000-05:00

thank you. your site was informative and personal. you make me almsot accept my SPD wiht pride, jsut becasue i can see that spd does not mean lack of worthy intelligence. but i think the "guidelines" the shrinks have about me types is so negitive. they tell them to purcerveire and wait thru the silence when all they really have to do to do is be interesting lol. and of course get us talkign about our favortie topic....what we think. personally i do tend to seek vailidation of the worth of my thinks, and to be understood, and i fear being seen in the wrong light , and naturally to have the light see me in the wrong.
as for seeking treatment, i am all for it. i am incredibly ready, but to find that person with whom i wont be afraid to feel the pain with, whom i respect, and more whom i can feel on a equal human footing with.ahhhh theres the rub.
many blessigns and i enjoyed reading.

You probably cannot help your schizoid friend. Fo...

2006-03-30T14:26:00.000-05:00

You probably cannot help your schizoid friend. For your own sake, you might want to move on. On the other hand, your scizoid friend craves a relationship at some level, even if he does not admit it to him/herself. The humane thing would be to be there for him if he feels he wants contact.

I have just had a limited 11 month relationship wi...

2006-03-30T13:11:00.000-05:00

I have just had a limited 11 month relationship with someone that fits the descriptions on this site so well. I had already figured out the SPD thing, but the more I read about it the more I understand it, especially the moral dichotomies.

I feel sorry for him but that I cannot help him and must move on, or do you have other suggestions?

He first was attracted to me because he said he 'trusted' me.

It is sad, he is sad, but I've tried and given up.